What if I were brave enough to reply?
I saw Katie Couric’s post on Facebook about wanting to start a book club, and I had that split-second thrill of possibility before my brain kicked in with its usual sabotage: This isn’t really for me.
She’s loving The Correspondent, which quite coincidentally is what I’m currently listening to on Audible. Starting off with, “Hey everyone!” made the invitation sound so inviting, so open. Like she was genuinely asking not just people in her circle, but people like ME, to talk about the book with her. But then my imposter syndrome started tap-dancing on my daydreams: Katie Couric is Katie Couric, and I am... not.
I’m an avid reader and writer, sure. I can hold my own in a book discussion. But can I hold my own in a book discussion with Katie Couric? The woman who has interviewed presidents and CEOs and every important person who’s ever had something important to say?
Side note, I was within 20 feet of Katie Couric back in 2022 when she was a panelist along with Chris Krebs, former Director of CISA, and Rashad Robinson, American Civil Rights Leader, to discuss the threat of misinformation and its impact on society—the closing keynote at the cybersecurity conference my company runs every year in San Francisco. I sat captivated in the front row. And though my team ordinarily gets the privilege of a photograph with the closing celebrities, it was the first major conference coming out of Covid, and well…I didn’t get a photo with Couric that year as I had with Christopher Lloyd the following year.
More than a Fangirl
Having grown up watching Katie Couric on TV, I have long admired her. In fact, when I was in college, I wanted to be her. I started out as a Communications major hoping to break into news, but after a short stint interning at a Boston station, I decided to switch gears. Watching a clip of myself, it became obvious that my eyebrows are unevenly placed on my face, which embarrassed me so much, I thought it would be better to change career paths than show my face on TV. Yes, vanity killed my dreams. Instead, I went on to become a teacher of English, where I could talk about books all day long.
In many ways, I did use my intellect and curiosity to inspire thought and reflection with the questions I asked of my students, but what I wouldn’t give for a mulligan. Maybe that’s why the thought of engaging with Katie Couric about literature makes me wonder if it is indeed possible to fulfill a part of that long lost dream.
What’s Really Behind the Ask?
When someone famous invites the public to join something, is it really a public invitation? Or is it more like when Oprah says “you get a car!” but you’re watching from your couch and obviously not getting a car? These social media platforms (which I’ve only just started to embrace) do create this weird digital limbo where you feel invited but absolutely are not really invited at all.
But here’s the thing that keeps nagging at me: what if the invitation really is for people like me? What if Katie Couric’s whole point is to create a space where readers—famous or not—can gather around a good book and have the kind of conversations that make reading feel less solitary? What if my assumption that I don’t belong is exactly the kind of gatekeeping that keeps people like me out of interesting conversations?
I’m reading The Correspondent anyway. I have thoughts about it. Smart thoughts, even. Thoughts that might be worth contributing to a discussion, even one that includes Katie Couric.
So maybe the real question isn’t whether her post was for me. Maybe it’s whether I’m brave enough to act like it was. Maybe I’ll join. Maybe I’ll lurk. It’s more likely that I’ll type out a comment and delete it seventeen times.
Or maybe I’ll even surprise myself and respond to her post and say, “I’m in!” Because I’m reading the same book, and maybe, just maybe, that’s enough.